Judgment day

I just got my A1c done. I will know the results in two days when I go see my endo.

I wonder what damage I've done over the past three months with highs and way too many forgotten boluses. I've reigned things in a bit this past week, though, but that won't be enough to save me.

I hate how I feel judged whenever I get an A1c. Not by my endo—he's never yelled at me or otherwise gotten mad. He's acted disappointed sometimes, but never angry or upset. It's me who judges myself. I always feel like I could be doing better.

Well, till my last A1c of 6.4. When I got that I felt like I could live with that forever. I think that's where the problems began. I didn't have a goal to aim for so I just slacked.

We'll see where I am ...

Time Flies

My, my, time flies. Twenty-six years already. I'm getting old!

Updates to this blog have been pitifully lacking. I think this is mostly because I'm getting my diabetes ya-yas out by participating in the Diabetes365 project. This has been an amazing experience for me ... I'm letting off a lot of emotional energy through these pictures, and I'm also (I think!) getting better at them and having fun experimenting! I think I may have found a possible new hobby to try dabbling in.

My diabetes control lately has been abysmal. Readings spiking into the high teens or low twenties on a daily basis ... sometimes more than once. I don't really have any excuse other than laziness. Work is insanely busy with the end of semester/term marks due and course development activities going on for one job. I'm taking two courses after the holidays (one distance education and one evening), and I've submitted an application to start a master's degree in the summer. I'm in the process of moving which is very exciting. And other than that I'm trying to foster some semblance of a social life ... Diabetes and exercise are top on my list of things to start once I'm moved in and settled. The fact that I will be within walking distance of a sports complex will help a lot!

I would like to dedicate more time to writing, though. Strangely, since I've started this blog I've done less writing than I did beforehand ... although I'm also a lot busier. I must also figure out how this RSS stuff works so that I can follow others' blogs more easily; another ting I'd like to do, but going to each individual blog to read updates takes way too much time to do on a daily or semi-daily basis.