Judgment day

I just got my A1c done. I will know the results in two days when I go see my endo.

I wonder what damage I've done over the past three months with highs and way too many forgotten boluses. I've reigned things in a bit this past week, though, but that won't be enough to save me.

I hate how I feel judged whenever I get an A1c. Not by my endo—he's never yelled at me or otherwise gotten mad. He's acted disappointed sometimes, but never angry or upset. It's me who judges myself. I always feel like I could be doing better.

Well, till my last A1c of 6.4. When I got that I felt like I could live with that forever. I think that's where the problems began. I didn't have a goal to aim for so I just slacked.

We'll see where I am ...